लेखन कहिल्यै पनि मेरो लागि सजिलो रहेन। जब कसैले मलाई कुनै निश्चित विषयमा लेख भन्न्छ, तब म अलिक डराउँछु। तर, मेरो डायरीमा भने म सहजै लेख्छु, जसले कहिलेकाहीँ मलाई आफैंलाई पनि अचम्म पार्छ। तर ती कुरा सार्वजनिक गर्न भने मलाई डर लाग्छ, किनभने त्यहाँ लेखिएका धेरै कुरा निकै व्यक्तिगत हुन्छन्।
म प्रायः सोचिरहन्छु—मैले डायरीमा त्यस्तो के लेख्छु जसलाई बाहिर ल्याउन डर लाग्छ? यसको उत्तर साधारण छ—म प्रायः भावनात्मक शैलीमा लेख्छु। र कहिलेकाहीँ आफैंले लेखेको कुरा पढ्दा म चकित हुन्छु, “अरे बाप रे! के यो साँच्चै मैले नै लेखेको हुँ?”
म कहिलेकाहीँ आफैंलाई बुझ्न मुस्किल पर्छ। कहिले म धेरै मिलनसार र बहिर्मुख जस्तो लाग्छु, त कहिले पूर्णतः अन्तर्मुख भएर आफ्नै विचारमा हराउँछु। मेरा साथीहरूले मलाई रमाइलो, हास्य गर्ने मान्छे भन्छन्, तर म प्रायः आफूलाई अलिक अचम्मको मान्छे ठान्छु—किनभने मलाई परिभाषित गर्ने एउटै गुण छैनजस्तो लाग्छ।
सायद म त्यही हुँ—विरोधाभासहरूको मिश्रण, अझै आफैंलाई पत्ता लगाइरहेको मान्छे, डायरीका पानाहरूमा बिस्तारै लेखिँदै।
”इन्द्रियहरुभन्दा पर मन छ, मनभन्दा पर बुद्धि छ, बुद्धिभन्दा महत्व पर छ र महत्वभन्दा अव्यक्त नाम प्रकृति पर छ, प्रकृतिभन्दा पुरुष पर छ । यसरी एकभन्दा अर्को बढी सूक्ष्म र बलवान् छ ।
विचारको वेग
विचार बिजुलीभन्दा पनि अधिक वेगवान् छ । बिजुली एक सेकेन्डमा सातपटक पृथ्वीको परिक्रमा गर्न सक्छ तर विचारहरुको गति त्योभन्दा पनि तीव्र छ, किनभने विचारहरुका परमाणु बिजुलीभन्दा पनि अति सू क्ष्म र बलवान् हुन्छन् । बिजुली आदि तत्वहरुभन्दा आफ्नो नजिकै खिच्न तथा टाढा पठाउनमा ज्यादा श्रम पर्दैन ।
यदि तिमी आनन्द, आरोग्य, ऐश्वर्य प्राप्त गर्न चाहन्छौ भने विचारहरुलाई शु द्ध बनाउने अभ्यास गर । तिम्राविचार जब उत्तम र उचित मार्गमा चल्न थाल्नेछन् तब तिम्रो तेज, बल, आरोग्य र ऐश्वर्य आफै बढ्नथाल्नेछ । त्यसबाट तिमीलाई अत्यन्त आनन्द र असीम शान्ति प्रतीत हुन थाल्नेछ र तिम्रो जन्म सफल हुनजानेछ । विचार भिन्न–भिन्न प्रकृतिका हुन्छन् । हामी तिनलाई राम्रा नराम्रा दुई श्रेणीमा विभक्त गर्न सक्छौ ।प्रथम कोटिमा विश्वास, प्र ेम, धैर्य, आनन्द, आशा, दया, स्नेह, पवित्रता र साहसको गणना हुन्छ । यदिहामीमा यी गुण छन् र हामी तिनलाई काममा ल्याउँछौ ं भने शरीरको विधानमा ती हामीलाई स्वस्थ रबलिष्ठ बनाउनमा सहायक हुने कुरा प्रतीत हुनेछ । दोस्रो कोटिमा घृणा, दुःख, बिलता, अधीरता, क्रोध,निष्ठुरता, अपवित्रता, काँतरता र निराशा आदि पर्दछन् । मनुष्यमा यीमध्ये एक वा दुई दुर्गु ण मात्र पनिशारीरिक स्वास्थ्य नाश गर्न र असमयमा बुढ्याइँ ल्याउनमा समर्थ हुन्छन् । क्रोधको प्रत्येक उत्थान आयुलाई घटाउने र रोग बढाउने हुन्छ । यसै प्रकारले धैर्य, प्र ेमादिको प्रत्येक कार्यले आयु बढाउँछ र शरीरलाई स्वस्थर बलिष्ठ बनाउँछ ।
My favorite lines from the book: “John, on your deathbed you will never wish you spent more time at the office.” So I started spending a little more time at home. I settled into a pretty good, if ordinary, existence. I joined the Rotary Club and played golf on Saturdays to keep my partners and clients happy. But I must tell you, in my quiet moments I often thought of Julian and wondered what had become of him in the years since we had unexpectedly parted company.
I saw your face, Gloomy, sad, filled with anger. I saw your eyes, Which reflected the same.
I saw you, but you didn’t see me. I tried to make myself visible, The more I tried to make you Comprehend, The more I lost. The more I tried, The more I lost. I lost you, All in the abyss.
You happened to be my friend, Once upon a time. Now I’ve lost myself more, Even more than before.
This poem was written on 15th May 2011, a moment when I was grappling with feelings of invisibility, loss, and the painful distance that sometimes grows between people we care about deeply. Looking back, it captures a raw, honest emotion—a mix of sadness and frustration—that many of us experience but often find hard to put into words.
Writing this helped me face those feelings and gave voice to a silent struggle. It reminds me how important it is to acknowledge our pain and how healing can start when we express what’s inside.
“Dia” is an emotional love story centered around the main character Dia Swaroop, an introverted biotech student. She has quietly loved her college crush Rohith for years. One day, unexpectedly, she confesses her feelings to him during a bus ride. Their love story begins, but unfortunately, a tragic car accident changes everything. Dia believes Rohith has died, and she tries to move on with her life. However, when she later finds out that Rohith is alive, she is caught in a difficult dilemma—torn between past love and present reality.
The film stands out because it tells the story purely through emotions and characters without the usual songs and dances common in Indian cinema. Realistic acting, beautiful cinematography, and a heartbreaking ending make it very special.
I say — this is a must-watch movie, because it’s not just entertainment but a journey that leaves a deep impression on your heart. It’s also one of my favorite films.
“दिया” एउटा भावनात्मक प्रेमकथा हो जसमा मुख्य पात्र दिया स्वरूप एक अन्तर्मुखी बायोटेक विद्यार्थी हुन्। उनी आफ्नो कलेजको प्रेमी रोहितलाई वर्षौंसम्म मनमा मात्र राख्छिन्। अचानक एक दिन बसमा भेट हुँदा उनी आफ्नो भावनाहरू बताइहाल्छिन्। त्यसपछि उनीहरूको प्रेमकथा सुरु हुन्छ तर दुर्भाग्यवश एउटा कार दुर्घटनाले सबै बदलिदिन्छ। दिया लाई लाग्छ कि रोहितको मृत्यु भयो, र उनी आफ्नो जीवन अघि बढाउने कोसिस गर्छिन्। तर केही समयपछि रोहित जीवितै भएको थाहा पाएपछि उनको जीवन फेरि दोधारमा पर्छ—अतीतको प्रेम र वर्तमानको निर्णयबीच।
यो चलचित्रमा गीत-संगीतको प्रयोग नगरीकन कथा र पात्रको भावनाले दर्शकको मन छोएको छ। यथार्थपरक अभिनय, सुन्दर छायांकन, र हृदयविदारक अन्त्यले यसलाई विशेष बनाएको छ।
म भन्छु — यो चलचित्र अवश्य हेर्नुहोस्, किनकि यो केवल मनोरञ्जन मात्र होइन, तपाईंको मनमा गहिरो छाप छोड्ने यात्रा हो। यो मेरो पनि मनपर्ने चलचित्र हो।
I am trying to write the true account of a story from my life—one of the very few tragic incidents that still leaves me in desperation, even after eight years have passed. Although the names have been changed to protect those involved, the emotions remain real and raw.
The date was 2061-01-08 (April 20, 2004). The telephone rang unusually early—around 5:00 AM, I believe. As I picked up the receiver, I had no idea that the call would shatter my world. It was Dhiraj, and the news he broke left me speechless. I was frozen with disbelief. Just the day before, we had been with our friend—laughing, joking, full of life. How could he suddenly be gone?
We rushed to his house. The atmosphere was heavy, tense. Grief hung in the air. His mother, father, brother—all were weeping. But the most devastated of all was Smritika. She looked as though her very soul had been ripped apart by the loss.
From her face, I could see that she had started to question everything—even God. If there really is a God, how could He allow this? Why would He take someone so innocent? So full of life?
Despite the pain, we entered his room to see him one last time. Susan lay still on his bed. His body lifeless, yet strangely at peace. His face—so young, so familiar—looked like it held distant dreams. The same face that had once burst with jokes, energy, and joy now lay silent, motionless.
For a fleeting moment, it felt like he might wake up and be surprised to see us all there. But no—Susan was cold now. He would never speak again. His eyes, once bright with dreams, would never open. The jokes, the laughter, the moments—we would never have them again.
I couldn’t breathe. I stumbled out of the room, my chest heavy. Outside, more mourners had gathered. Among them, a man—perhaps his uncle—was speaking softly, quoting from the Bhagavad Gita, trying to soothe shattered hearts with sacred words.
Eventually, Smritika’s sobs grew quiet. Her body was still, but her eyes burned with a quiet rage. And I felt it too. Why him? At times, I tried to convince myself that it wasn’t really him on that bed. That maybe Susan had gone somewhere better. But my heart knew the truth. He was gone.
My body trembled. It felt like the cold that had entered Susan had seeped into my bones too—freezing me from the inside.
This is something that was once performed in a theater long ago. It was written by one of our relatives for the play, and I am writing it down as accurately as I remember, without attempting to alter the main theme.
मेरो नाउ ठ्याउके ठिक
ठ्याउके दिक्क थियो आफ्नो नाम को कारणले ।” बुवा आमा ले किन राखे होलान मेरो यस्तो नाम्”, यस्तै प्रकार ले सोच्दा सोच्दै उसले बाटो मा एउटा आइमाइलाई झाडु लगाइरखेको देख्यो र उसको मनमा यस्तो बिचार आउन थाल्छ,”यदी मैले यो आइमाइ सँग नाम साटे भने राम्रो हुने थियो” । यती बिचार गरी उसले आइमाइ सँग नाम सोध्यो र आफ्नो उद्देष्य प्रस्ट पार्यो । आइमाइको नाम लक्ष्मी थियो र दुबै जना बिच नाम साट्ने सहमती भयो र उसले खुशी भएर भन्यो,”आजदेखी तिम्रो नाम ठ्याउके र मेरो नाम लक्ष्मी कसैले सोध्यो भने यस्तै भन्नु” । दुबै जनाले गाँउ भरी आफ्नो नाम साटिएको बारे मा जानकारी गराउन थाले तर फेरी पनि गाँउलेहरुले उसलाई ठ्याउके भन्न छोडेनन । फेरी उस्ले एकजना भिकारी सँग नाम साटेछ । भिकारी को नाम धनपती रहेछ तर पनि गाँउलेहरुले उसलाई ठ्याउके भन्न फेरी पनि छोडेनन । एकदिन उसले एउटा मलामी जानलागेका मान्छेहरु लाई मरेको मान्छे को नाम सोध्यो र मरेको मान्छे को नाम साट्नु उपयुक्त ठान्यो । त्यो मरेको मान्छे को नाम अमर थियो ।अब उ फेरी सोच्न थाल्यो,”अब त सायद मलाई सबै जना अमर भन्छन होला,किनभने अमर नाम को मान्छे त मरिसक्यो”,तर फेरी सबै जना उस्लाई ए ठ्याउके, ए ठ्याउके भन्न थाले । अन्तिम मा आएर उसले यस्तो बिचार गर्न थाल्यो:
लक्ष्मी देवी झाडु लगाए धनपती मागे भिख । अमर जैसा मर गया तो मेरो नाउ ठ्याउके ठिक ।। त्यस दिन देखी उसले आफ्नो नाम जे छ त्यही नै ठीक छ भन्ने निस्कर्ष निकाल्यो ।
